Friday, 9 May 2014
00:12
A night I'll remember the rest of my life, that will stick and stuck in my heart till I lose my mind some day. He came, chasing after me after I said those words. Words that I don't want to say, the ones I shouldn't at all. For every word I type, I teared and teared. It tears my heart, I..
He was smiling, happy (forcing I suppose) thinking and trying of ways to turn the situation around. and me, what was I doing, giving that stoning + angry face. I was plainly speechless. He said so much things to me, I have no idea what to do at that moment. Never in my life, someone ever did so much for me, chasing after me. Was it worth the while?
The first time we held hands (cause of your jokes) The first time you gave me a forehead kiss. The first kiss we had (cause of a bet lor) The first chalet we had together with Erebus. I'll keep everything in mind. Every moment spend with you, I'll treasure them. :b
I see you in my future. We have so much places that we are gonna go right. I will wait for you, just like how you wait for me too. We will see stars together, travel overseas together, stay together, just as long as we're together heh. For all I know I really really love you. I hope you do too hehe. Let's go further, to something called future.
Silly boy of mine, thanks for everything. Let's forget all those unpleasant things and start afresh again. One last sorry, for everything that I have said to you, for saying things I have hurt you with. You and I have fragile heart, I know hahaha. I want you to know, you're important to me as well. You have a place in my heart, find yourself. If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world. Let's waste time, chasing car.
Reasons why I like you.
You're cute, for the first time I see you. I'm happy that I caught our attention. although I'm just a normal girl, but I know you see me in a different light.
You're childish and retarded, just like me. How can we have not matched? HAHA! Continue being like a small boy, I like that.
Your smiles, it got me dreamy every time hahaha. I could never withstand that. Smile more, and no we smile togetherrrrr.
Let's get chubby together too <3 I would still want to keep fit ya... :x Your hand fits in mine like it's made just for me.
Your juicy lips, HAHAHAHAH sorry for saying that.
We are the cutest and most lovable couple. yayyyy👊xoxo
& I'm being random.
Tuesday, 6 May 2014
23:52
so I just ate my own words. what the fuck am I suppose to do now. can I really not do this anymore. I'm getting drained every single day. my body is tired, my mind is tired, so is my heart. I feel I've no more energy to play on. Just slowly dying inside, don't watch me. Maybe next time I should just shut up and not say anything, it sucks to see people upset because of me, I hate that feeling. I thought everything was going well, but well I guess not. I'm pretty much done. It's okay, one word from you, I'll be gone. it's just that simple. I don't want to hurt anyone anymore and I really cannot continue living in this horrible mystical world.
how am I suppose to understand my fucking self. I'm screwed okay. Just couldn't get what my mind is thinking some times. I hate myself like really really very much. Let me feel some pain please. I need to kill my inner soul to find what I really want. that process of dying quietly, I would love that.
it's tough, I could barely survive anymore. I'm exhausted from everything I've done. I'm not superhuman.
& I'm being random.
