Sunday, 24 February 2013
00:55
So suppppp!
Feeling really down yesterday.. went out for a jog and sweat it all out! The breeze was really awesome, thanks ah hehe ^^ hmm I feel so good now lalalalala~
A brand new day, a brand new start I hope? Lost my phone recently.. All the memories are now gone, sighpie, my life so miserable one eh? I did so many good things still liddat to me? Why ah? Life so unfair ah.. I just hope one very day, I can have my phone back.. pleaseeeee :( The pictures are the ones I treasured most leh :( Oh well, I doubt I'll ever get it back too.. Life at home plus without a phone, ain't that manageable, it's really torturous :/
Everything, I decided to let go of it. Stop thinking about those unhappy stuffs and start being happy now! :D SMILE LA LOL. I know I can do this, let's fight the battle. Not gonna care about anything anymore. I know what I'm doing, this is how I do it.
Treasure those who loves you yo!
-winkz-
& I'm being random.
Sunday, 10 February 2013
13:46
Had a super bad new year eve. and now I'm grounded..
Having so much fun with my friends last night and this morning, it decides to take a change. I'm sorry to all my friends whom I've caused trouble too. It was all my fault. Ton and drinking alcohol - is it wrong? I don't think so. I literally did nothing wrong at all. But in my dad eyes, whatever I do, was never good enough. Well, I was bad, I lied to him about many things. But honestly speaking, I really didn't meant to.. In the end, I tried to be honest with him.. He said I was lying again. Why wouldn't he trust me? I can't stand any longer. That moment when he scolded me this morning, a lot of thoughts were running wild in head. Only me and him in the house. I ask myself, should I just jump off the building?
I really dontknow what to do, feeling lost till now. Why can't I just have an understanding parents? Sometimes I wish I was a guy, being rebellious would mean nothing at all. I could stay out late at night, do whatever I like. Nothing will ever change. Sigh, till now I am thanking myself that I didnt die. I want to enjoy poly life, I don't want to die in regrets. But what can I do now? Nothing. Gahhhh should have just die laaaaa. I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH.
I hate the world. I hate everything. Why is everything giving me so much problems? I can't even enjoy my life properly. I just want to enjoy my day with my friends. I will never forget that moment when I kneel down in front daddy, begging him to not get my friends in trouble. Listen up, dad this is for you. "I hate you for life. Thanks for causing a scar in my life, I can't believe you even wanted to bring me to the police and jail me. What kind of father are you? You're not even a good father. You've ruin our lives. I will never forget what you've done to me this day. I wished I was never your daughter." Remember at the start you were saying " you don't give a fuck about me?" and when you left the house for work you said " in my eyes, you all are my lovely daughters? " Don't tell me all this bullshits, I'm never talking to you again, NEVER.
Too much hatred inside of me, sighh.
-Fuckup
& I'm being random.
Sunday, 3 February 2013
19:36
Hmm.. talking about today, IT'S THE MOST PEACEFUL AND HAPPIEST DAY EVER <3
Work today was totally awesome man, love it so so much! Play and fool around with friends, really never laugh until so hard before. The feeling is really really good hehee. I've move on I guess, I just need that little bit more time. I can do this (Y) All the fun I had during work, sneaking around and drinking Qoo hahaha. Shhh, LOL. Got myself a chatting buddy, it was good to talk to him, no stress, no nothing. Hope to have more of this days.. Too much unforgettable memories to be kept ;D
& I'm being random.
Saturday, 2 February 2013
05:00
Thinking bout you,
thinking bout me,
thinking bout us,
what we gonna be.
Open my eyes, it was only just a dream.
Let's just that treat everything as a dream, nothing like this have happen before. I swore to myself I'll forget you in no time, trust me, I can do this.
I started the war, and I'm gonna end this war. I didn't regret telling you those three words, at least I know I've tried it, and was expecting that kind of result. After all it just sounds ridiculous having to had a crush on you, when I barely know you. All I wanna tell you is, each time I receive your texts, I felt overjoy, a step closer to knowing you better, to become closer friends. At times when I'm down at work, I thought of you, I dontknow why I did, I just did. Recalling the days when we worked together, it was exceptionally fun, when you pull a prank on me.. Seeing your laughter, melts my heart :')
Last night, we talked about so much stuff, and I almost thought we had the chance to... but probably because I gave up halfway, thinking that all this should just have ended. I thought I've tried so hard. You confused me with so much things I can barely understand, I never understand your words. I knew you didn't want to hurt me. Whatever you told me, didn't change what I think of you. I believe what I see for myself.
The other time I took a long walk home through the carparks, I thought to myself " okay, after i walked past this car, I must forget you. " Isn't this stupid or what, perhaps I was too naive. Sometimes I wish, I can travel back in time and rather not be a part of your life, I want to apologize for giving you so much troubles, "I'm truly sorry." lastly, maybe a goodbye.
After all, it's really nice knowing you. The end of the journey between us.
& I'm being random.
